For the longest time I have missed the point, when I first came to know God, I thought all my problems would disappear. I thought it was the beginning of a problem free life, a life of abundance and ease; and after a couple of years, I learned that life would not unfold as I anticipated.
I have had moments that made me question the foundation of my faith, seasons when I tried to do all I could imagine – getting God to change a situation and nothing worked. I’ve battled with trusting that God is in control and has a bigger plan for my life.
Now I am all for living out my best life, Glorifying God and moving mountains but I had to learn something before I could move mounts, I had to learn not to associate my happiness to situations (now hear me out, I’m not saying that we should embrace suffering and make our bed in misery but our circumstances should not be the source of our happiness).
On the 30th of December 2019 I sat on the floor in my room to write down all my goals and desires for the year 2020 and right jotting them down, God spoke to me through a scripture in Mathew 6:19-20: ‘Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal’. God made it clear to me that I had to focus my attention on the treasures above, my salvation, my walk with Him instead of chasing after material things. The Holy Spirt made it clear that I had to detach my heart from material things and give it to Him instead (where it would be in safe hands, free from disappointment).
To be honest I was eager to put it all into practice even though I did not completely understand the depth of that scripture. Over time I gradually forgot about it and went about my business. Months later, after a few blows and fails; the Holy Spirit reminded me about the scripture and gave me a complementing scripture form the book of Genesis 15:1.
In the chapter God spoke to Abram in a vision saying “Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, you exceedingly great reward.” Now that summed it all up for me, If you know a bit about Abraham you will know that he had wealth but lacked a son and if you do some research you will learn how important it was to have an heir in his time. Being childless was a big deal, this was Abram’s greatest desire! When God spoke to him in a vision, God knew that Abram needed a son but still said to Abram ‘I am your exceedingly great reward’. Mind blowing, huh?
What does it mean? It means that as much as our needs are important and urgent, God is our ‘exceedingly great reward’ He alone can satisfy us, not a job, not a husband/wife, not money, absolutely nothing in this world can fill the void meant for Him. If all these things could bring ultimate happiness and fulfillment then rich folks would not commit suicide. Greed would not be part of human nature – we’d be satisfied after receiving long-awaited blessings. But even after conquering these desires, we still find something else that we ‘need’, and the chase and urgency continues. This is proof that our souls are looking to be filled and quenched by God. God was telling Abram that a son would not fulfill him – only God was enough and able to quench his thirst and strong desire to be happy and whole.
To be continued…